Thanksgiving is almost here, and I’m all atwitter with anticipation. In celebration, I plan to once again partake in the age-old tradition of gorging myself with an embarrassing amount of food, creating gastro-intestinal problems the like of which are rarely experienced in industrialized countries. This year my family and I are planning on eating out […]
Archive | Comedian
Tales of the Halloweird
Halloween was always a scary time for me when I was growing up. Not because of all the ghosts and goblins and such, but because my mom made all my costumes. Every kid knows that an acceptable Halloween costume must either be scary or cool, and Mom’s costumes fell short on both counts. I was […]
Kiss-Jeep
I don’t know if you are aware of it, but I am the guy who invented Kiss-Jeep. There are some parts of the country where Kiss-Jeep hasn’t caught on yet, so let me explain. Let’s say you’re driving down the road with your honey. The first one in the car that spots a Jeep Wrangler […]
Invasion of the Family Snatcher
In celebration of Scrappy, The Wonder Dog’s birthday* this month, I offer a never-before-seen peek at my journal entry for the week of his adoption 15 years ago. October 12 – My wife called me while I was at the store and asked if I knew why there was a small, bedraggled dog hanging around […]
Mistletoe-tally Bizarre
A lot of odd little customs have somehow become attached to the Christmas season. Take mistletoe, for example. What an amazing concept! Hang a little twig over someone’s head and you get a kiss. I guess that makes sense. Nothing says romance like a poisonous sprig of parasitic vegetation. I’m not sure how the mistletoe […]
Stupid customer service
Not all of my customer service stories are about great service. This is a video of me telling a story about bad service I’ve gotten, but don’t worry! I disguise the name of the company so you’ll never know who I’m talking about!
Strange Celebrations of the Fourth Kind
My family just celebrated Independence Day as we do every year, and for the first time in my life, it strikes me what a strange way it is that we celebrate this holiday. First, we go over to my Uncle Harold’s house and stuff ourselves almost to the point of hospitalization. Then at some point […]
My Painful Christmas History
Christmas has often been a somewhat painful season for me. I grew up in a big household with five kids so my parents were trying to cut corners any way they could. They would wait until about three days before Christmas to buy our Christmas tree, which was always a Scotch pine, the cheapest Christmas […]
The Cheapskate’s Guide to Getting a Babysitter
The only economical babysitting options I’ve found are grandparents, newly married couples, and dogs. Let me save you some time and tell you that the dog option isn’t going to work, for two reasons: 1] Dogs don’t have thumbs so when you call home to see how the kids are, they won’t be able to […]
What makes Chick-fil-A so dang good?!
In this video I talk about what happens at Chick-fil-A when things go wrong. If it even halfway sorta kinda makes you smile, please give me a thumbs up and follow me for more humorous and motivational videos!