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Your Customer Service DNA Test Result

My wife gave me a DNA test kit for Christmas and I had big hopes for the results.

The first thing I was hoping for was some sort of exotic heritage so people will think I’m cooler than I really am. So when I found out that I am 1/1000 Japanese (True story. Not making that up.), I got excited because I thought that meant that I have a rich history of cultural diversity. Then I realized that it’s just as likely that a lab tech sneezed into my spit sample.

The second thing I was hoping for is that I would find out that I’m not related to the people I grew up with. All my life I’ve cherished a secret hope that I was one of those babies that was switched in the hospital at birth. I can’t be the only person on the planet that feels this way, right?

Don’t get me wrong. I love my weird family. I would do anything for them. Well, anything other than an organ donation. Or helping them move. Or visiting them. But other than those things, I’d do absolutely anything for them.

But I honestly think I would like them better if I wasn’t related to them. Maybe a favorable DNA test would give me an excuse to sort of distance myself a little bit.

The next time one of them calls me, I could say, “I won’t be able to make it over there this weekend. My new, uh, (how do I say this?) better, less weird family is having a soirée out at their lake house, so I won’t be able to make it to your weenie roast.”

This whole DNA thing got me thinking about how every business ought to look at their own DNA to see what percentage of their business is comprised of customer service.

A super easy way to do this is to simply ask your customers. Some folks are wary of asking customers to grade their service because they’re scared of the negative input they might receive. But you can’t fix a problem that you don’t know about, so why not just ask so you can start improving and growing your business?

The best time to ask the question is immediately after your customer has used your product or service. The longer you wait to ask your customer, the less response you will get, and the more negative the response will usually be.

Take Delta, for instance. Immediately, after every phone conversation I have with them, I’m given the option to take a one-question survey. I love that the entire survey is only one question. Who doesn’t have the time to answer one question? The question they ask is something like “If you were to own a customer service business, would you hire the Delta representative with whom you just spoke?”

The answer to that one question will tell you everything you need to know about your customer service.

So don’t be afraid to talk to your customers and ask the tough questions. My favorite questions to ask my clients after my events are:
Did my program meet your expectations?
Is there anything else that I could have done to serve you better?

If you dare to ask these types of questions, you’ll often find that you hear some great things about your products and service. Sure, occasionally you’ll hear about something that needs to be fixed, but remember that the more things you improve, the less negative responses you will hear.

By the way, in case you’re wondering, my DNA test confirmed that I am absolutely, positively related to my extended family. So now I’m wondering if maybe I’m not the only one in my family that feels like I do. In fact, now that I think about it, I’d say there’s a better than even chance they are taking their own DNA tests and hoping they aren’t related to me.

© 2020 Charles Marshall. Charles Marshall is a nationally known humorous motivational speaker and author. Visit his Web site or contact him via e-mail at
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